Any Ideas??

It is beautiful day here in Charleston. Sun is shining. Sky is blue. Air is chilly, but not cold. Very fall-like. The smell of baby poo in the air....HUH??? Yes, that smell is one that I have been accustomed to since having children. BUT, the smell somewhat changes dramatically when the "product" is smeared all over flat paint walls. My son will not keep his diaper on during nap time and it NEVER FAILS that he must clear his system during this time. Why? I ask you. I have tried putting big boy panties on him over his diaper. Nope. I have tried getting him fully dressed. Nope. I have tried putting sleeper jammies on him (you know, complete with zipper and snap). Nope..except in this case, he had the jammies on when I got him up (yeah!!!) but had somehow taken the diaper off from under the jammies so I was left with an even more interesting mess. I will spare you the details of what happens after the diaper comes off, but please, if you have any suggestions, make haste and let me know. The walls are stripped to the wood. We need help. FAST.

On a cleaner, and better smelling, note, my husband and I have been invited to a United Way fundraiser this evening complete with eats and drinks. Should be lots of fun. I had to find a bratsitter, I mean babysitter, for the evening. SO, I asked my sister. The kids LOVE their Aunt Katie. She's fun. She lets them crawl on her and beat her up. She makes funny faces. She's the BEST!!!She also wanted to know how much I was going to pay her. (If you know my children, you will understand why). Since funds are limited, I offered to make her a cake. Since she does that for a living, that did not go over well. I asked her price. And this is the reponse I got...and I quote "HOMEMADE peanut butter cookies and HOMEMADE Russian Teacakes, no nuts. They better be homemade, I WILL know the difference." Do you KNOW what a pain in the ass these 2 kinds of cookies are???? BOTH have to be made ahead of time, chilled, then rolled into balls. I don't roll
balls, just ask my husband. (He-he). I don't have the time, strength or stamina to stand at my counter and roll 3 trillion little balls THEN roll them in sugar and powdered sugar. Um, no. Not gonna happen. I am STANDING UP TO THIS NONSENSE!!! WHO WAS I IN A FORMER LIFE....HITLER????? WHY CAN'T I CATCH A BREAK??? BABY POO. ROLLED BALLS. I AM UP TO MY EARS IN BULLSHIT!!!

Sorry, got a little upset. I am off to put on my girl face and get ready to go meet my husband for some adult, wine enjoying fun....and roll 3 trillion balls....